Honestly, look into nihilism

And stop being a weak minded nice guy who no one cares about and everyone ignores

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Canada Goose sale canadian goose jacket The ones who are weak and who people don’t want to be around are ‘nice guys’ people who act nice cheap Canada Goose with the expectation of gaining something from it, rather than just being because that’s how they like to act. Canada Goose sale

canada goose When it comes to confidence and approval, honestly, you need to ask yourself why you think you need it. Yeah, you’ve got uk canada goose outlet that feeling of needing other people’s approval, but why do you have that feeling? buy canada goose jacket canada goose

canada goose coats on sale Is it because you don’t have a purpose in life and are looking for someone else to be your purpose? This is toxic for you and whoever you idolise. Honestly, look into nihilism. It isn’t hopeless, but it demands the understanding that there is no purpose in life, and even self created purposes are meaningless and how this lack of purpose frees you to live your own life without Canada Goose Parka depending on others. canada goose coats on sale

canada goose deals Is it because society has told you that people should have friends and be liked by others? Well, buy canada goose jacket cheap this is a cycle here: you need canada goose factory sale approval from others because those those others tell you you need their approval. This is a more complicated case, and my best advice is the broader general solution. canada goose canada goose clearance sale deals

cheap Canada Goose That general solution Canada Goose sale is: who do you want to be? cheap Canada Goose

Canada Goose Outlet Think about it, seriously. Who do you want to be as a person? Not canada goose store what you want https://www.canadagoosestorevip.com to be famous, rich, popular, ect but who. Canada Goose Outlet

Canada Goose Parka What values do you want to hold? What morals and principles? How do you want to act in various situations? How do you want to treat other people? Canada Goose Parka

canadian goose jacket Canada Goose Coats On Sale Don’t think about how other people would treat the you you’re thinking about. Think only of how you would feel about it. canadian goose jacket

canada goose clearance A big reason, IMO, for seeking other’s approval is we don’t have a strong way to judge ourselves. We rely on other people to tell us how we feel about ourselves, as we’re not sure how we should judge ourselves on our own; we can only compare to other’s reactions. canada goose clearance

canada goose clearance sale This mental model of who you’d like to be is how you judge yourself. Not by what other people tell you. Not by how they react to you. There is a time and place to consider that, but not now. When you do something, question canada goose uk shop whether its something the person you’d rather be would have done. Better yet, ask yourself before you do it. You will almost certainly not be the person you want to be. Nobody is. We all have things we think canada goose we could improve on. So do so; improve, and continue to strive not for attention in the eyes of others, but to become the person you want to be. canada goose clearance sale

Canada Goose online This will take time, and is a slow process. There will be times that you will judge yourself by other people rather than your own mental model, but as soon as you notice that’s what you’re doing, catch yourself canada goose coats in that process and consciously judge yourself according to your mental model instead. Repetition breeds habits. Presently you’re in the habit of judging yourself using other people. Break the repetition, and you’ll slowly break the habit. Start replacing it by repeatedly judging yourself compared to your mental model, and you’ll start that as a new habit. Canada Goose online

canada goose black friday sale The only thing left to say, IMO, is to be honest with yourself. If you want to be a jerk and not care about others at all acknowledge that that’s what you want to do. Don’t try to pretend that you’re not. Odds are, you don’t want to be that jerk, so its important to distinguish standing up for yourself and canada goose clearance doing your own thing, from being a jerk to those around you. You can do the former without he latter, and the latter without the former. The key difference is that you can be a genuinely nice person care for others, help them out, Canada Goose Online ect and still be doing your own thing while standing up for yourself. You just have to do it because it is who YOU want to be, what you think is right, rather than because you’re looking for a reaction of some kind from the other people. Judge yourself, don’t rely on the judgement of others. If you are doing it because you are looking to gain from the other’s reactions, you’re being ‘nice’ to them; you’re not doing your own thing, not standing up for yourself, and you’re not actually being nice, but manipulative instead. You could be doing the same actions; what matters is why you’re doing them. canada goose black friday sale

Canada Goose Jackets So, be honest with yourself. Who do you want to be? How are you different from that person? How can you get closer to being that person? Then carry through. You are being genuinely nice, and are trying to be the person you want to be; you want to be a nice person. Yes, your reasons for wanting to be a nice person in general may be because its the most likely route to get people to like you, but if you treat it as a general character trait you seek canada goose outlet to always embody, rather than a case by case trait you use when you want people to like you, then you should be fine. Canada Goose Jackets

buy canada goose jacket cheap If, on the other hand, you’d be more dismissive or outright hostile towards these people if they wouldn’t like you and want to hang out with you, and if you’d blame them for not liking you for your niceness, rather than understanding that people are complex creatures and any level of chemistry between them isn’t owed or guaranteed, then you are not being nice. You are being manipulative. You canada goose uk black friday are not trying to be a nice person in general, you don’t see yourself as an overall nice person you are simply using cheap canada goose uk niceness when convenient to try and get others to do what you want. This is the defining factor of a ‘nice’ guy Canada Goose online vs a nice guy, and what makes so called incels, and other toxic individuals, so unpleasant to be around; they feel they are owed something for their efforts, that just because they are nice, others should give them what they want; friendship, work, favours, money, love, sex, attention, ect and will blame other people when they don’t get what they want. buy canada goose jacket cheap

buy canada goose jacket People are canada goose black friday sale complex, and if you are ok with the idea that you won’t actually Canada Goose Jackets get what you’re looking for by being nice, even if it does increase the chances of it, you’re probably alright. If you think you’re owed something in return and other people are in the wrong if they won’t give it to you, then you have a problem buy canada goose jacket.

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